Seen here proving she does shop in the maternity section, Khloe Kardashian is allegedly the result of an affair between Kris Jenner and another man thus making Khloe not a real Kardashian like everyone with a set of eyes always suspected. (For those of you keeping score at home, that’s two theories confirmed in two Read More ...

I know some people don’t like talking about the Kardashians in any way, shape or form, but they’ve grown on me, and they’re some of the easiest “celebrities” to cover. Plus, they constantly appear on the covers of the tabloids, and their drama is always neatly contained in very precise famewhore stories. Take this one, from In Touch Weekly’s cover story this week. Apparently, Kim and Kourtney Kardashian are “at war” over weight. Specifically, Kourtney has lost her “baby weight” while Kim still has the gigantic booty, and now “old insecurities” are playing out amongst the Kardashian Klan:

Not long ago, Kim Kardashian was world-famous for her sexy curves, while her pregnant sister Kourtney was stuck in the role of second banana. But eight months have made a world of difference for the ultra-competitive Kardashian sisters. After working hard to lose her baby weight, Kourtney has her slim body back, reawakening Kim’s old insecurities. And now, the two sisters are more competitive than ever.

“They are always looking at each other’s body and picking it apart,” says an insider, adding that in the past, Kourtney was always the “skinniest sister,” and now that she is once again, she’s making sure Kim knows. “She always makes fun of Kim’s ‘lumps,’ meaning her cellulite,” the insider reveals.

According to a Kardashian confidante, it’s a battle that’s been raging between the two women since childhood. With Khloé, 26, considerably younger and always a bit bigger than her two sisters, Kourtney and Kim engaged in fierce competition as teenagers over who had the hottest, slimmest body — and who got the most attention from boys. Of course, now it isn’t just dates the girls are fighting over — it’s money, fame and airtime.

Although Kim used to be far and away the most famous Kardashian sister, she’s seen Kourtney get more attention over her new baby and her tumultuous relationship with her boyfriend, Scott Disick. And now that’s she’s lost the baby weight, Kourtney seems to be taking Kim’s place as the hottest star of Keeping Up With the Kardashians. “Kim isn’t about to give up her throne without a fight,” says another family friend. Dressing up, hitting clubs — and working hard to slim down — Kim is determined to take back the lead role in her famous family.

[From In Touch Weekly]

God, Kourtney sounds like such a bitch. I always think that about her - although, to be fair, all of the Kardashian women seem like major tools. But Kourtney specifically. Anyway, do I really need to defend Kim? She has a different body type then Kourtney. Kim is what we in the South refer to as “thick”. Nothing wrong with that, and she can work out every day for hours and hours and she’s still going to have a big, thick booty.

One last thing about Khloe Kardashian - yesterday, Radar reported that Khloe was in a “jealous rage” over Lamar’s flirtatious behavior with other women, and that Khloe had stormed out of a restaurant. Khloe corrected the record: “Sorry to disappoint everyone, but Lamar and I aren’t big fighters. Come to think of it, that was actually a really fun night out with all of our closest friends…lots of dancing, drinks and our usual silliness. Stories like these don’t really bother me too much anymore.” Oh, did you realize that Khloe and Lamar’s one-year anniversary is next month? Day-um, I didn’t think it would last this long.

Much like Jessica Simpson, Khloe Kardashian would benefit from real management, someone who is not related to her (her mom). I’d never thought about that comparison before today, actually. Which is worse - Papa Joe Simpson or Kris Jenner? They’re both pretty awful, right? Anyway, I digress. So Khloe has given yet another interview about the state of her womb. She has been talking about getting knocked up since before she and Lamar Odom even got married - she brings it up in conversation, she tweets about it, and she’s still giving quotes about it every time she’s asked. Urgh… so here’s your Khloe’s Womb update:

Dogged by pregnancy rumors for months, Khloé Kardashian says that she isn’t actively trying to get pregnant. But she isn’t not trying, either.

“It’s in God’s hands, and let it happen when it happens,” the reality star told PEOPLE in the Swagg Mobile Application lounge at Saturday’s Mercedes-Benz Polo Challenge in Bridgehampton, N.Y.

“I’m 26. It should happen naturally. I don’t want to force it. I would love to have a baby, and if I get pregnant, I get pregnant.” She adds with a laugh: “I don’t think, like … my biological clock is ticking!”

That laidback attitude might not be great news to Lamar Odom, who’s made no secret of wanting a child with his wife sooner rather than later. But when it does happen, Kardashian says the NBA star will be a great father.

“He’s already a great dad,” she says. “He has two beautiful children [with ex-girlfriend Liza Morales] who he is an amazing father to … But he definitely wants a baby right now.”

Kardashian admits that seeing older sister Kourtney have a son, Mason, in December put everything in a different perspective. But even that didn’t necessarily move up her own timetable.

“Being an aunt, I have the best of both worlds,” Kardashian says. “I have him … and give him [back] when I’m over it and need adult time.”

[From People]

Not to get all up in her uterus (gross), but I’m actually surprised that Khloe isn’t pregnant yet. She and Lamar have both said that they’re trying for it at various times, and I think Khloe would actually like to be a mom, and would probably be pretty good at motherhood. But I’m saying that because Khloe is my favorite of this famewhore family, and because I think she actually has two brain cells furiously rubbing together. Do you think Khloe is having fertility issues? If she is, I apologize for getting in her business and I hope she and Lamar work through it.

Speaking of working through their sh-t, Radar had an interesting story about Khloe getting crazy jealous of Lamar’s flirtations with some ladies:

Lamar Odom was flying high after his Team USA basketball win over France Sunday night, but wife Khloe Kardashian put a damper on the evening after storming out of his celebration.

RadarOnline.com has learned exclusively that the attention Lamar gave to other women while out celebrating was more than Khloe could take – eventually causing her to leave solo.

“Women kept stopping by the table to say hi to the guys,” an eyewitness at Juliet Supper Club told RadarOnline.com. “After only 10 minutes, Khloe’s jealousy got the best of her and she stormed out.”

The couple headed to the restaurant/club in New York City with an entourage of friends following the game, including fellow baller Kevin Durant and rapper Fabolous.

“I overheard Khloe cursing Lamar out for being ‘too friendly,’” the eyewitness said. “But Lamar didn’t really seem bothered when she left.”

The eyewitness continued, “He ordered two more bottles of liquor and stayed with his buddies for a few more hours before heading out.”

Sources at the restaurant say Khloe didn’t have anything to drink before storming out; she was fueled purely by good old fashioned jealousy. Management at Juliet Supper Club could not be reached for comment.

[From Radar]

Don’t make Khloe angry. You wouldn’t like her when she’s angry. Seriously, Khloe will beat some ass if she’s pissed off, so Lamar better check himself. Beyond that… meh. Just flirting. I would have been pissed too, but I’m a jealous, possessive bitch.

This week’s Life & Style cover story is basically what I reported a few days ago, that Kim Kardashian broke it off with Miles Austin, and that she is probably boning Cristiano Ronaldo yet again, all because she was seen with Ronaldo in a hotel lobby. A source told the mag: “If she were really crazy about Miles, she wouldn’t have done that.” L&S did get an “exclusive” statement from Kim confirming that she’s single:

Life & Style can exclusively reveal that Kim Kardashian is single once more! Since her breakup with longtime boyfriend Reggie Bush, Dallas Cowboys wide receiver Miles Austin has been her first and only public boyfriend. Now, multiple sources confirm to Life & Style that their once steamy relationship is fizzling away.

“The two are casual at best,” an insider tells Life & Style. “Kim knows she needs time to date and take it really slowly after her breakup with Reggie.”

Kim confirms she’s single, telling Life & Style that viewers will get to see her single life play out on the new season of Keeping up with the Kardashians. “I think this is the first time I’ve ever really been single filming the show,” Kim tells Life & Style. “You’ll see me single and having a good time.”

Certainly, Kim has no shortage of men vying for her attention. In fact, the reality star couldn’t resist an invite to lunch with old flame Portuguese soccer player Cristiano Rinaldo and his hunky friends, at the Polo Lounge restaurant at the Beverly Hills Hotel on August 3. An insider says she spent most of the meal flirting with the international soccer stud.

And while Kim says “it’s been a lot of fun” being single, the driven star is putting her career first. “I’m a workaholic, so I’m trying to dive into work and make it all about me and try ing to focus on everything that I want to accomplish now,” Kim tells Life & Style. “I’m all by myself, so I can do it all!”

[From Life & Style]

Damn, was Miles bad in bed or something? Because Kim is kind of treating him like she wasn’t into it, at all. But I thought Kim was the one who wasn’t all that? Oh, well. As for the rumored hookup, Page Six’s source (Kim herself, probably) says: “Kim and Cristiano bumped into each other and chatted as friends. He’s still with [model] Irina Shayk, and Kim doesn’t have time for a relationship.” Why is Kim so “busy” again? I mean, I know she’s a “model”. Is that it?

The Kardashian family drama also covers this week’s Us Weekly. The story is all about how everybody hates Scott Disick, and it’s basically just an advertisement for the show:

The Kardashian family is deeply divided over Kourtney’s decision to stay with Scott Disick, reports the new issue of Us Weekly, on stands today.

“Kourtney feels like she lives two lives, because half the family has accepted Scott back and other half hasn’t,” says an insider of Disick, 27, the father of Kourtney’s 8-month-old son, Mason.

In one corner, Khloe, 26, leads the critical crew comprised of mom Kris Jenner and brother Rob. Meanwhile, Kim, 29, and stepdad Bruce Jenner feel therapy has redeemed Disick, who has also cut down his drinking.

“Khloe is always the bad cop, and I’m always the good cop,” Kim told Us Aug. 9 at the Elle Girl Model Search shoot. “I’ve been through more relationships than Khloe, so I can understand what it’s like to go through difficult times and still want to be with that person. Khloe is like, ‘You f–ked up, you’re out.”

Indeed, “there have been knock-down, drag-out fights between the girls over Scott,” a family insider admits to Us.

Both Khloe and Kim urged Kourtney, 31, to dump her beau of four years after one of Disick’s partying binges ended up with him punching a mirror. “The whole situation frustrates me so much I want to scream!” Kourtney fumes on the Aug. 15 finale of Kourtney & Khloe Take Miami.

Khloe admits to Us she’s “hard on” their relationship. Even though Khloe and Kim will stand by their sister, they won’t give Disick a break.

“There’s a lot of them, so it’s tough,” pal Jonathan Cheban, star of E!’s The Spin Crowd, tells Us. “It’s a lot of girl power and they attack.”

[From Us Weekly]

On this, and many other issues, I’ve always been Team Khloe. I think Khloe has had Scott’s number from the beginning, and Khloe thinks (correctly) that Scott is a f-cking douchebag who shouldn’t be around women, especially her sister. She’s absolutely right.

By the way, why do all of the Kardashian women look like drag queens on the cover of Us Weekly? True, their styling is usually “dragtastic” but this is one fug cover.

Covers courtesy of Jezebel.

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